


...why would I care?

by ineedthislikeaholeinthehead



Category: American Actor RPF, Broadway RPF, Hamilton - Miranda (Broadway Cast) RPF
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, M/M, That "We don't know we're dating" trope, first date (sort of)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-14
Updated: 2016-01-14
Packaged: 2018-05-13 20:29:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5716060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ineedthislikeaholeinthehead/pseuds/ineedthislikeaholeinthehead
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Anthony and Jasmine come up with a good idea for Lams fans, Anthony wants to make sure kissing Lin won't upset Jon.  But Jon doesn't know why he would care...does the rest of the cast know something about their relationship that he doesn't?</p>
            </blockquote>





	...why would I care?

**Author's Note:**

> Usual RPF warnings apply. This is a work of fiction not meant to offend anyone, and I most definitely do not own the rights to anyone mentioned here.

Anthony was nervous. He was irrationally nervous, because it wasn’t going to be a big deal. He knew that, like, in his brain, he knew that, you know? But it still felt like a weird thing to have to ask someone about, and yet he felt even weirder with the idea of going to Lin without doing it. 

Jasmine had had a really funny idea the other night, regarding Laurens and Ham and the fans love of them. And he’d laughed and then they’d gone off into a different direction and she’d spent the night and everything had been pretty great. Then he woke up and Jasmine handed him a legal pad. He didn’t even know he’d owned a legal pad. 

“What’s this?” 

“It’s that sketch I was talking about last night.” 

“You wrote it?” 

“I said I was gonna.” 

“Yeah. But you did it that fast?” Jasmine got up and started walking towards the shower. 

“No point in wasting time.” She turns back towards him. “Read it before I get back.” 

And the thing was, it was funny. And she really got it, you know? Except, something he thought was going to be a joke didn’t end up being a joke, or rather, was a joke…

“What did you think?” She asks while she’s drying her hair with a towel. 

“You made me and Lin kiss at the end.” She drops the towel, rolling her eyes in annoyance. 

“I didn’t make you and Lin kiss, I made Ham and Laurens kiss.” 

“Yeah… but why?” 

“Because, it’s funny. Trust me, people will go crazy.” 

“What if Lin doesn’t want to do it?”

“Why wouldn’t he? You saying it’s not good enough?” 

“No!” He quickly responds, because she looks just a little scary at the thought that he’s insulting her. “Just...you know.” He’s laughing, trying to lighten the mood, willing to lie if it will get him out of this. “You’re the only person in the world who can stand kissing me.” 

She rolls her eyes, again. “I’m not falling for that kind of bs.” She sits down, and gives him a kiss. “No one wouldn’t want to kiss you.” She tells him, then puts her head on his shoulder and holds his hand, just the way he likes. Which means she wants something. “Will you bring it to Lin?” He jumps up. 

“Why me?” 

“Because, he’ll do it if you say you want to.” 

“He will not!” 

“Why not?” 

“Because...Jon will get jealous.” 

“Oh please. It’s for a video.”

“So?” 

“So, I’m pretty sure he knows you’re not trying to take his man.” 

“You never really know how bad some one’s jealous streak is until you get in front of it.” 

Jasmine gives him a look, wondering why he knows anything about that. 

“Then ask him.” 

And that’s what Anthony intended to do. He’d seen Lin leave his dressing room along, meaning that Jon must still be in there, it had been his experience that they spent virtually all of their free time together behind that dressing room door (at least they kept it closed!) so the odds of getting to talk to him alone were pretty good. 

He knocked on the door, and his wager had paid off. 

“Come in.” Jon says and Anthony opens the door, closing it again behind him. “Oh, hey.” Jon says, his eyes lighting up like he was happy to see him. Not for long, buddy. “What can I do for you?” 

“Can we sit down?” He asks.

“Sure.” Jon sits on the couch, so he sits on the other side- Lin’s side. 

“I have a weird question.” He starts. Jon smiles devilishly. “Can I kiss Lin?” He stops smiling. “ It wouldn’t be for real or anything.” Anthony starts to explain. “Jasmine just came up with this really funny character thing...” Jon just looks confused.

“Well, I think you should probably ask him about that.” He says with a laugh. 

“Yeah… I will… but I just wanted to check with you first.” He turns his head to the side, just a little, like the answer was right behind Anthony’s head or something. 

“Why…? Why would I care?” He asks, and now it’s Anthony’s turn to look confused. They both just sit there staring for a second before it hits them simultaneously. Anthony was asking if Jon would get angry because he thinks they’re going out...And Jon didn’t think anyone knew he and Lin were going out.

Anthony jumps up. “Ok. I guess...so you don’t mind, right?” 

“Uh… No… of course not.” Jon says, and there’s that blush coming up that he can’t hide, and Anthony doesn’t want to make it any more weird than it already is, so he fucks off as fast as he can. 

Jon sits back down, astonished. Does the whole cast think he and Lin are dating? And even if they were...which they totally weren’t… does the whole cast think he’s the kind of guy who would get jealous over a kiss? 

Not that he wasn’t. It had been ages, days even, since Lin had kissed him. And Anthony had such a great excuse. “I’m not kissing you- Laurens isI” God, he wished he had that sort of excuse. 

Right now, the only thing he could do to explain away their much too close friendship was that they shared a dressing room. And that bonds you. It wasn’t...it wasn't exactly false. But he’d shared dressing rooms before. And it usually only bonds you like that when you were fucking. And they weren’t fucking. Apparently that didn’t matter, though. You kiss, dance with, hug, and cuddle with a guy one little time (a day, on camera, for the whole world to see) and suddenly you’re dating. 

Jon didn’t know what to do with the discovery, so he turns on the TV and the nintendo. Instead of thinking about what a travesty it was that everyone thought he and Lin were fucking, when they weren’t fucking, he decided to distract himself with attempting to beat Lin’s high score on a game he could barely play. Needless to say, it wasn’t a very good plan. 

He was off the rest of the day. Which blew chunks, because it was a two day show, meaning he was bumping into Lin all day and night. Every time they passed each other, Lin noticed the rosy blush moving all the way down his neck. Jon’s muy blanca, so he kinda always looks pink, but it wasn’t like Lin didn’t know what his skin looked like. 

It wasn’t like Jon’s skin wasn’t currently one of the most predominant topics on his mind or anything. It definitely wasn’t like that. Even so, he knew Jon wasn’t supposed to look that red. 

Sure, the first time he was running past Lin, so maybe, it was plausible. But after that, no way. And as soon as he could, he high-tailed it out of the theater, not even giving Lin a chance to say goodnight and may steal a couple of seconds skin-to-skin contact. 

Bullshit, that’s what that was. It’s like he didn’t even know that those last few minutes before he hit the streets, the ones where he’d be “cold” and Jon would put his arms around him, or when he’d sit right next to him and see how far he could push it before Jon realized that Lin had climbed into his lap, or when some one would tease them about being so close so the only logical thing to do was kiss- just so everyone would know how not a relationship this was… Those kinds of strictly platonic moments were the ones Lin absolutely lived for. 

Of course hearing a sold out crowd cheering after a performance that you’d worked so hard on was fantastic. But Lin would take the thrill of feeling Jon’s heartbeat throbbing as hard as his own any day of the week. 

And he wasn’t going to let Jon deny him that pleasure. Jon’s place was in the opposite direction of Lin’s, a fact that Lin completely ignored as he got on the train heading that direction. He had about a half hour head start on Lin, who fought the urge to text him the entire ride. Which wasn’t that long but felt like a millennia because of the agitated mood he was in. 

When he finally got to Jon’s door, he held his breath while knocking on the door, hoping that Jon hadn’t decided to go out. Luckily, Jon was a total dork, so he had nothing better to do than look surprised (and pink) and invite Lin into his home. 

Lin had been there dozens of times, and every time, some had been different, and every time, Lin had caught it. 

“New Blue Pillow.” He says as he sits down on the couch. Jon sits down right next to him, and Lin instantly relaxes. 

“How do you do that?” 

“Attention to detail. It’s a good talent to have.” 

“God is in the details.” 

“I believe the Devil is in the details.”  
“Whatever the saying is. Either way, you’re wrong.” 

“No I’m not.” Jon grabs the pillow and unzips the seam.

“It’s not a new pillow. It’s a new cover.” Lin shrugs, unaffected. 

“Semantics. Why’d you ditch me today?” 

“I didn’t ditch you.” Jon lied. He wasn’t having it. 

“Bullshit.” 

“I wanted to give you time to talk to Tony.” 

“About what?” Lin asked, confused. 

“He didn’t talk to you?”

“I mean, we saw each other. We said hi and all that.”

“I kinda feel like this might stick out in your head.” 

“Then no.” Lin had gotten pretty good at reading what Jon was thinking, but right now, his face was blank. “Why?” Jon grabbed the pillow tighter, curling his stomach around it. 

“He asked me something today...about you.” 

“Ok…”

“He wants to kiss you.” Lin laughs. 

“I’m sure he has more than he can handle already.” 

“It’s not like that. It’s Jasmine’s idea.” Lin just raises his eyebrow. This is getting interesting. “They have a Laurens sketch idea.” 

“Ok...so why didn’t he just ask me?” 

“That’s why I said.”

“And?” Jon mumbles something that was probably English, but not anywhere near an audible level. “What?” 

“He wanted to make sure I wouldn’t be jealous.” And once he blurts it out, Jon is as red as a tomato and he won’t look up to meet Lin’s eyes. Lin wants to laugh, because the whole situation is sort of surreal and hilarious. But he doesn’t want to hurt Jon’s feelings, so he holds it in. 

“He thought you would be jealous?”

“Apparently so.” 

“Why would you be jealous? I kiss you all the time.” 

“Yeah, well, maybe that’s why.”

“I’m not following you.” 

“Lin, he thinks we’re...together.”

“And?”

“And? And if he does, then probably the rest of the company does too.” 

There’s a silence. This is the make it or break it moment. And Lin has to give himself a mental pep-talk before he opens his mouth. 

“Is that a problem for you?” He finally asks. Jon looks at him like he’s just said tomatoes grow better on jupiter- completely confused. 

“What do you mean? We’re not going out.”

“Yeah, but..like how are you saying that?”

“What?” Jon was still clutching that pillow like a life raft in shark infested water.

“‘Cus there are two ways that you could say that. 1) “We’re not going out because I hate your face and the fact that you’re always on me is dangerously close to sexual harassment.” or 2) “We’re not going out because I’m too chicken shit to ask you to dinner” 

“Why do you automatically assume that I’m the one who should ask you out for dinner?”

“Ok, fine. But, so, like...it’s not the first one, though?” What’s a vegetable that’s redder than a tomato? A beet. Jon was turning beet red now, and still wouldn’t look Lin in the eyes. 

“No. Of course not.” And then another line of unintelligible mumbling. 

“Enunciate, would you?” 

“I like you. Alright?” Lin grabs Jon by the chin, and makes him look up at him.

“Very alright.” He says. Then he pulls the pillow out of Jon’s arms and tosses it to the floor as he lays on top of him and plants his lips on Jon’s. Jon reacts quickly, pulling them both down to the couch and- finally- slipping his tongue in Lin’s mouth. 

After a few minutes of making out, they both sit up. 

“Jon, I have to ask you a serious question.” 

“Ok.” 

“Are you gonna get jealous when I kiss Anthony?” 

“That depends.”

“On what?”

“Are you gonna take him out to dinner?” Lin stays quiet for longer than Jon’s comfortable with, so he pulls up the pillow and smacks him in the face with it. 

“Wha-? Alright. I won’t take Anthony out to dinner.” He says, then he throws the pillow again, and pounces on Jon.

**Author's Note:**

> EDIT 1/14/16: 
> 
> You guys have all been super nice, so I'll be as cordial as possible before I back the fuck up out of this fandom. 
> 
> I will not be archive locking anything. 
> 
> I respect what makes you comfortable or uncomfortable with what you read, and you have the freedom to A) not write or read unlocked stories B) read and not comment/kudos or C) read while not logged in/under a different pseudonym. What you do NOT have the freedom to do is make me lock my work. You can ask and maybe some other writers will go along with it- which is their choice. I am not one of those writers. 
> 
> I'm also not taking this down. I believe it was pointed out-before I said anything(?)- that no one is asking me to, but even if they were, I don't see a cease and desist letter in your hand. It would be very odd to get one from the cast (AKA: the most famous RPF role players in the world)
> 
> I know that there is hesitation between the fandom and the cast, many of whom are savvy web users who, if so inclined, could find unlocked works. But, I have to tell you, I just google searched for "Jonathan Groff and Lin-Manuel Miranda" and I couldn't even FIND this work showing up on the first 15 pages. You'd have to be looking pretty hard to find this. Which says a lot more about them than it does about us. 
> 
> Frankly, I'm not even concerned if some one did find it. There's nothing offensive here. I'm not reliving any of their grievous errors in judgement, or singing about an affair. (I don't really think there's anything wrong with doing that, but you see where I'm going, right?)
> 
> If I was ashamed of what I was writing, I wouldn't post it. 
> 
> I DO take umbrage to the implication that somehow making fanworks publicly available has anything to do with disrespecting the cast. Even in the dirtiest of stories (which I was looking forward to writing) there is very rarely an instance of RPF or fic in general that is specifically meant to make their muses feel unsafe, unloved, or disrespected. 
> 
> This is a world of fantasy. We're talking about people that we've never/rarely had interactions with, and creating characters that use their looks and mannerisms and public personas. LMM knows he has created a caricature of A.Ham that isn't going to be an exact copy but a character, that a modern audience can relate to. I can't imagine that he, or anyone working close to him in the company, wouldn't understand and appreciate that stories written about them on a website like this wouldn't be using the exact same concept. 
> 
> This is a moot point because they have a lot more going on in their lives and wouldn't waste their time on this) but even if they didn't necessarily enjoy this ( and I get it, my writing's not for everyone :-P) how would it being public vs locked be any less insulting to them? The fact that it's hidden doesn't negate the fact that it exists, does it? So, is it offensive all the time, but we're allowed to be offensive if they don't know about it? There's some cognitive dissonance going on here that I'm not about. It's either offensive (and in that case, why is it being written?) or it's all in good fun which makes it irrelevant who can and can't see it. 
> 
> Last LMM comparison, but it makes a point. Lin has done something INCREDIBLE with Hamilton. Not only the amazing play in and of itself, but bigger than that: he's brought theater to a whole new audience. I remember being a theater kid in the late 90's early 00's (yes, I'm old) and do you know who liked theater then? White, suburban kids. I'm not saying there weren't exceptions, but I can't imagine what it would have been like to be the odd man out by being super poor or a POC. And that's never going to have to be the case again. He's bringing in kids to get to experience something that we've basically made an elitist art form, and giving them a chance to fall in love, too. 
> 
> I'm a plebe and won't ever have the opportunity to do something as magnificent as he has. But what I can do is let anyone who doesn't have an AO3 account (for whatever reason) still enjoy something if they know how to search it out. It's nothing. But it's nothing I don't dismiss lightly.
> 
> We don't have to agree, and you don't have to interact with me at all if this act is a really a grievous one for this community, but your arguments aren't compelling enough to make me want to change the conscious decision I made to keep my work public. I am fine with keeping this conversation up here, or deleting all traces of it if it makes you feel more comfortable. Just let me know if I need to do any clean up on the comments section.
> 
> I do want to say that you guys are great. I'm sorry if this comes off as defensive (I already know it's long winded) but you ARE making me defend my own choices. We don't agree on this, and that's ok. It's been short, but it was certainly a ride!


End file.
